No matter how much natural confidence any of us have, we can ALL use a boost every now and then, right? Whether it’s confidence in a relationship, your job or an new endeavor you’re about to pursue. Topping off the confidence tank is always helpful.
Anyone who says they never question themselves or have a little bit of a confidence issue in some area of their lives, isn’t telling the whole truth. It’s simply part of the human psyche. We’re all prone to feeling a lack of confidence. Especially in things we’ve never done before. Or in things we think are hard, complicated or are fearful of.
Things That Can Sabotage Our Confidence
What We Learned As Children –
The messages we heard until about the age of seven sets the stage for our perspective on the world and ourselves. During this time in our lives, our brains are just downloading everything we see, hear and are taught without question. Even with the most well-meaning parents, experiences we have as kids can determine our level of confidence in many things. These experiences can still be affecting us even as adults if we don’t examine them closely.
It’s no secret that advertisers spend billions of dollars to undermine our confidence on a daily basis. Their hope is that we’ll try to buy our way to more confidence through their products or services. Causing people to question themselves, their cars, homes and clothes is a sure fire way to get people to spend money. They say we’re exposed to 5,000+ ads per day! So it’s no surprise to think that confidence can slowly be chipped away with enough creative marketing. It’s really more like brain washing to me!
Social Media Comparison –
If you spend any amount of time on social media, sooner or later you’ll be comparing yourself to someone else. It’s just how our minds work. It’s natural to see what someone else is doing and measure ourselves against that. But of course, the problem comes when we continually do this. When this comparison starts causing us to question ourselves too much, our self confidence definitely takes a hit. It could be time to back away from the IG!
Memories from Past Experience –
We’ve all had failures or challenges in our past. It’s just part of being human. But sometimes these past experiences from our subconscious mind still control us today. Our confidence in our abilities can be sabotaged from things that have been over for years. But if we still reference these experiences for current situations then it can definitely keep us from moving forward.
All of the things mentioned above can have an impact on our daily confidence. We need to be more proactive to combat these influences and take our power back. Today I want to share my 10 ways to boost your confidence!
10 Ways to Boost Your Confidence
List Your Strengths –
Get our a pen and paper and begin to list what you’re good at. What do you excel in? These don’t have to be giant skills. Even things such as being a great cook, being kind, having a green thumb with plants, etc. You’re good at many things big and small…LIST THEM!
Accept Your Limitations –
Nobody is good at EVERYTHING. The sooner we accept this about ourselves, the better. Not accepting our own personal limitations is denial and continues to undermine confidence. Accept that you can’t speak Japanese, you’re lousy at baking bread or you can’t sing. It’s OK! Stay focused on what you CAN do well or take action to improve.
Don’t “Should” Yourself –
I think women are particularly bad about this. How many times does that little voice in your head say you should do this or that. That you “should” be able to do something or have something when you just don’t. Stop with the “shoulds” already! Either you do or you don’t. You accept the situation and act accordingly or just drop it. All these “shoulds” are undermining your confidence and you probably don’t even know it.
Gain Some Perspective –
If you’re someone who can get lost in the details,it could be time to take a few steps back to see the bigger picture. Some times the daily ups and downs of life can cause us to lose faith. As Margaret Thatcher once said, “You may have to fight a battle more than once to win the war.” Step back and look at your situation with a wider lens. It’s probably going your way more than you think.
Try Something New –
The surest way I know to boost your confidence is to try something you’ve never done before. Fresh knowledge and new skills will shatter any fear, doubt or insecurities you may have. I wrote an entire blog about overcoming my fear of learning to ride a scooter about this very subject. If there’s something you lack confidence in, start doing it! But the caveat here is this: you must be willing to be a novice or not be good at it at first. Put your ego aside, and become a student again. Trust me, after 6 months now of riding a scooter, I feel amazing and my confidence about myself has skyrocketed!
Celebrate Your Wins –
I don’t think enough of us truly celebrate our victories. Sure maybe the big ones, but what about ALL the small wins that add up to the big ones? Did you get your workout in today? Awesome, pat yourself on the back. Did you refrain from yelling at the kids today? Perfect. Keep up the great work. Acknowledge the simple daily wins. It will most certainly help boost your confidence.
Practice Positive Self-Talk –
Become more aware of your inner voice. Is it more of a critic than an encourager? For many of us, the majority of our inner dialogue isn’t positive or helpful. Write down positive words, phrases and repeat them to your self daily. Listen to uplifting stories or videos. Being proactive about our self-talk is critical to boosting confidence. We have to become our own best friends and cheerleaders. It’s a skill that we can all learn to do better.
Accept Compliments –
This may sound simple enough, but many women just can’t accept a compliment without deflecting it. When someone compliments you, pause for just a second. Absorb what they’ve said and let it sink in. Don’t try to block it with false modesty. The other person is giving something to you. Accept it gracefully and learn that a simple “thank you” is the best and most confident thing you can say.
Show Others How to Treat You –
Whatever behavior we accept from others is literally teaching them how to treat us. If we allow our boss to yell at us, then we’re sending the message that it’s something we’ll accept. If we allow a family member to get into our business, we’re not standing up for ourselves. And the more you stand up for yourself, the more natural confidence will come to you. Also, we must treat others how we expect to be treated. They’ll learn from our example.
Realize Your Skills and Abilities Don’t Really Come From You –
Being the spiritual person that I am, my confidence can get shaky when I forget where my talents really come from. If I remember that God is just creating and living THROUGH me, then the pressure goes down. I’m not really the one doing it. I pray on a daily basis for my higher power to direct my thoughts, words and actions. When I remember that I can do nothing without my source then the little “me” that lacks confidence can relax a little. Everything we need to succeed will be given to us if we ask for it. I have definitely found this to be true. This is the ultimate confidence booster in my book!
I hope these ideas will help you when you need a little boost in your confidence level. Thank you so much for reading today. If you enjoyed this post, please SHARE it with your friends and don’t forget to SUBSCRIBE to my newsletter. No spam, just my latest ideas and inspiration to help you create a “Life you Love!”